Valentine’s Day Sex: How to Prepare Down There

Valentine’s Day is a day for giving… and receiving.

Just as runners prepare for a marathon, you both need to prepare your gentleman and lady parts to ensure you can go that extra mile for your partner. Here are a few tips:

  1. Hydrate – Wine is sexy, water is critical. Alcohol and physical activity (if your sex isn’t strenuous enough to qualify as a workout, you’re doing it wrong) can rapidly dehydrate the body. The best way to make sure your system stays hydrated is to drink a glass of water between each alcoholic beverage. Bonus effect: This will also help to keep you from getting too sloppy too early. Ladies especially adhere to this advice as dehydration can cause, ahem, all-over dryness. Try Walton Wood Farm’s B’ver Balm– a vaginal aftershave that can also be used as a moisturizing salve, with Coconut Oil and Sunflower Seed Oil that will help get your hydration levels back on track. If you’ve read this far,  you’ve discovered the secret discount code which entitles you to 20% off any Walton Wood Farm products until Feb 1st. Use code: VDAY
  2. Personal Care – Out of all the fancy schmancy down-there hair removal options, the fact remains that the quickest, cheapest, and most popular will always be the trusty razor blade. The problem with shaving on or the day before Valentine’s Day? You guessed it. Friction. Those annoying little red bumps can quickly turn into painful large bumps that can ruin bring an abrupt halt to even the sexiest of nights. The fix? Walton Wood Farm’s Aloe-infused Better B’ver Creamy Shave Soap was expertly designed with the sole intent to moisturize and provide a smooth glide for any razor. Remember to shave with the grain, not against, and finish up with Walton Wood Farm’s B’ver Balm. Our B’ver Balm is also terrific for after waxing!
  3. Fun – Whether you’re brand new lovers, spicing up your marriage, or anything in between, the pressure of the “most romantic day of the year” gets to everyone. Candles, handcuffs, blindfolds… 50 Shades of Lame. So, have a little fun and mix things up! Having fun together is new sexy which is why a lot of modern couples are turning to reciprocal grooming. Let him shape you as you trim him – you’ll be able to watch his anticipation grow before your very eyes. Check out Walton Wood Farm’s Essential Valentine’s Day gift set with Proud Cock and Better B’ver shaves and balms for personal care designed to primp your partner.

Why are gifts for men so hard to buy?

Introduction

Whether it’s the holidays or a birthday, if you’re looking for men’s gift ideas, it isn’t always easy. Women are easy. Kids are the easiest. But let’s focus on the difference between men and women for now. Why is it so much harder to buy a gift for a man?

The Stuff Gap

The first and biggest reason is also the least helpful when trying to solve our problem. “It’s society, man.” Giving a gift to a woman is relatively simple when we live in a culture where women love to (or feel like they need to) accessorize. Go to any department store. The vast majority of the stuff will be aimed at women. Vast arrays of clothing in different shapes, sizes and colours, not to mention the jewelry, purses, scarves, hats, shoes, etc.

Gifts for men? If you’re lucky, they will be cloistered off into a dark corner where a paltry variety of the same shirts, the same belts, the same underwear, all with different brand names placed on them to give the illusion of choice. Okay, that’s not totally fair. But it can feel that way. It’s the place where men go in, get what they need, and leave in peace. Good luck finding a gift for men under $50 that isn’t something lame like a wallet or a tie.

Man Toys Are Pricey AF

We know men love stuff just as much as women. The thing is, the stuff they like, they’ll typically buy themselves, or it will be too expensive for most gift givers to give. Oh, he likes golf does he? Have you seen how much a new driver costs? And maybe it’s not the right one for his style of play. How about a watch? Great gift idea. But do you want to lay down that kind of coin for something that might not be his taste? And then there are the higher end toys. He likes gadgets? He likes ATVs? He likes sailing? C’mon, man!

All this brings most people to give the men in their lives the good ol’ impersonal gift cards, booze, or ultimate male “I have no idea what to get this guy” gift, a gift card for booze!

The Best Gift

What kind of gift actually changes you for the better? Research shows that people who spend their money on experiences – rather than on accumulating stuff – are more happy. Some stuff is an experience. Women have been the beneficiaries of these gift items for decades. Think of the typical mother’s day gift fare: Bath salts gives you the experience of a relaxing bath. Scented candles gives you the experience of a warm aroma that fills your space. Even simple moisturizer gives you the experience of literally being comfortable in your own skin (although it won’t do much for you figuratively).

Men have historically be shunted out of that gift experience, we believe unfairly. And the worst part is men think this is as it should be. There’s this idea that men ought to be “independent” but that get interpreted as being “wantlessness” or worse “needlessness!” We all need and want things. Men are no different.

Think about the best gift you’ve ever received. The best gifts are the ones you didn’t even know you wanted. That means that the person who gave it to you actually knew you better than you knew yourself.

Science has proven that giving really is better than receiving. So if you want to feel real good, give a gift that speaks to the man you’re giving to.

Our Recommendations

Here is a short list of things we can prove that are tailored to men of specific attributes, especially if he’s got a good sense of humour.

Does he work with his hands?
Does he have a beard?
Does he – or maybe desperately needs to – manscape?
Does he use product in his hair?
Does he – on occasion – sometimes need to wash?
Does he have a pair of lips? (still works if he just has one lip)

If you’re reading this, chances are, you already know what we do. You know we live to make natural style skin and hair products. And we believe that most men love to use them, they just don’t know it yet. We believe that men prefer high-quality, hand-crafted, naturally sourced ingredients are preferable to the petrochemical goops you get at the grocery store. We believe the man in your life will love the experience of taking care of himself differently. Surprise him with something he didn’t know he wanted.

How to Manscape with Pride

 

What it means to be a man has changed since your father’s generation. Gone are the days of the 1970s when pride meant shrouding your manliness in a cloud of hair, like puffy and curled shrubbery. It used to be the measure of a man was how mo’ can you grow? And judging from the those racy old magazines you found in the woods when you were thirteen years old, it was almost as if scissors weren’t even invented until 1993.

 

It was a different time.

 

Thankfully that era is long gone and we’ve since learned that the best way to show off your male goodness: Manscaping. I mean, is manscaping even optional anymore? What would it be like if you grew out your mons pubus to it’s peak bushman? Do you really want your partner to have to hack through the wilderness of your loins with a machete? Who has the time for that anymore? 

 

The razor, however, is a double edged sword… like, literally and figuratively. Yes, the blade makes you look hairless and sexy, but it can also slash and burn. Or are you so tough that you drop-trou in front of a stranger with a jar of hot wax in her hand who has decided she wants to spend every day mercilessly ripping out hair right from the follicle?

 

If that is you, sir, I say: Brave. Truly brave.

 

Sometimes it hurts to look good, but it doesn’t have to.  

 

Luckily there is Proud Cock manscaping aftershave balm. It’s 100% natural, specially formulated to soothe, hydrate and heal the sensitive skin around your sex place with shea butter, avocado and apricot oils.

 

How do you use it?

 

That’s the kind of question only a dapper and intelligent man would ask.

 

Simply shave as you normally would with our Proud Cock Shave Soap scented with Patchouli essential oils. We recommend shaving after a warm shower to open up your pores and moisten the skin. You know the drill: Shave soap and a sharp razor with warm water. Now it’s time for le apres rasage upon the freshly shorn skin. Your skin will love it, and so will your special someone.

 

Just because you’re spoiling yourself (and your lover), doesn’t mean you have to be mean to the environment. You won’t find any of the toxic dyes, SLS, parabens or phthalate (do you even know how to pronounce that?) that the gross mega-corp products use. It’s something we take pride in. We’re cruelty free, vegetarian friendly and, of course, gluten free. You should only be putting wheat there if that’s like, you know, your thing. If that is your thing, then wear it like a badge of honour. We’re all about confidence here.

 

So be proud: Stand tall, feel smooth, and lightly scent your junk with the pleasant citrus aroma of bergamot. When the time comes for the great reveal, we know your pride will be accompanied by joy.

 

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